The Great Unknown

Have you ever had something that you’ve always refused to do, never even considered, but then an opportunity presents itself and you second guess everything? I’m facing that right now, and it’s kind of exhilarating in a way.

I’m not sure it is something I want to do, but now that the possibility is there I find myself thinking about it all the time (even sometimes when I should be doing something else). I’ve said no to it in the past, I’ve been pretty vehemently against it, but …

There are a lot of things to consider, it’s a big lifestyle change. There are the financial implications; we’ll need a bigger car, it will mean some wardrobe changes, it’s going to mean at least a short period of unemployment for me – there is no doubt it would be expensive. And then there are the other aspects; it would be a physical challenge for me, I worry that about how I will handle the extremely long nights, and I will admit that there is an emotional aspect to making this decision.

And there are lingering questions in the back of my mind, things like, how will the dogs take to such a big change? Also, it will be tough to tell in advance how it will impact my and Les’s relationship. Speaking of which, Les has always kind of wanted to do it, I’ve always been adamantly against it – and he knew that when we got married, he was okay with it. But he’s also most definitely okay with me considering the possibility now. And he’s more prepared for it than I am, his childhood has prepared him a lot better than mine did me.

I love to travel and this would definitely force some changes in that regard, it would be a lot more expensive to travel than the way we have been. Trips will take a lot more planning and we’ll definitely have to bring more stuff with us all the time. We simply won’t be able to travel as much, no question about it.

So there are reasons not to do it. But on the other hand, there is only a limited time when we can, we have a limited time frame when it is even possible. And it is a long term decision, there will be no backing out of it once we make it.

Les and I have been together for nearly 10 years, we’ve lived in 7 different houses in 4 states, we’ve had 8 vehicles, and together we’ve visited 31 states, 2 Canadian provinces and one federal district. But are we ready for this next step?


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